The “princess treatment” trend has swept social media, spotlighting romantic gestures like bringing coffee to bed, gifting flowers weekly, or paying for a partner’s manicure. Popularized on TikTok, this practice of treating a partner with extra care has sparked heated discussions. On August 25, 2025, in Rio de Janeiro, the topic took center stage on GNT’s Papo de Segunda, featuring Jeniffer Nascimento alongside João Vicente de Castro, Francisco Bosco, Eduardo Sterblitch, and Russo Passapusso. While some see these acts as empowering displays of affection, others argue they reinforce traditional gender stereotypes. Psychologists and couples weigh in on whether this trend fosters healthy relationships or perpetuates outdated roles. Why do simple gestures stir such controversy? The answer lies in the intent behind them and the balance between partners.
The trend gained traction through viral TikTok videos where women showcase partners performing acts of care, from opening car doors to planning surprise dates. However, influencers like Courtney Palmer, who suggest not speaking to waiters or relying on partners to tie their shoes, have fueled criticism. Detractors argue such behaviors can infantilize women or imply submission, raising questions about the line between care and control.
- Trend origins: Rooted in social media, inspired by romanticized ideals from shows like Bridgerton.
- Viral appeal: Popularized by videos comparing “bare minimum” to “princess treatment” standards.
- Core debate: Seen as genuine affection by some, but regressive by others due to gender role implications.
Defining princess treatment
The term “princess treatment” lacks a strict definition but typically involves gestures that go beyond everyday affection. These range from small acts, like remembering a partner’s coffee order, to grander ones, like funding spa days or planning elaborate surprises. In 2025, the trend exploded with couples posting humorous videos, some featuring challenges where partners face playful “punishments” like a splash of cold water for misjudging what qualifies as “princess treatment.”
Psychologist Michelle Sampaio, director of the Brazilian Association for Studies in Medicine and Sexual Health (ABEMSS), notes that the trend can be healthy if rooted in mutual care. “It’s about reciprocity, not one-sided expectations of submission,” she says. Problems arise when gestures reinforce dynamics where women are cast as passive or dependent, undermining equality in relationships.
- Common gestures: Opening doors, gifting flowers, covering date expenses.
- Controversial acts: Avoiding interaction with service staff or relying on partners for basic tasks.
- Psychological impact: Can boost self-esteem but risks fostering dependency if unbalanced.
- Expert view: Communication and mutual respect are key to healthy dynamics.
Cultural roots and media influence
The princess treatment trend taps into a nostalgia for old-school romance, fueled by shows like Bridgerton and Downton Abbey, which glamorize chivalric gestures. Etiquette expert Daniel Post Senning explains, “Fictional narratives shape how we view love and relationships.” This fascination with royal or aristocratic ideals resonates even in countries like Brazil, where monarchy is absent, driving the desire to treat or be treated as “royalty.”
However, the trend also intersects with movements like “tradwife,” which celebrates traditional gender roles. Critics highlight that while romantic gestures are welcome, actions implying passivity—like avoiding public interactions—can be concerning. Influencer Courtney Palmer’s videos, for instance, sparked backlash for suggesting women should defer to partners in social settings.
- Historical inspiration: Draws from romanticized depictions in period dramas.
- Tradwife connection: Some see overlap with traditional gender role advocacy.
- Public response: Split between those embracing romance and those wary of regressive dynamics.
Balancing love and equality
Experts emphasize that reciprocity is crucial for a healthy princess treatment dynamic. Michelle Sampaio stresses, “A relationship where only one partner gives care creates imbalance.” Studies, like a 2017 Journal of Experimental Psychology paper, show that couples practicing regular affection resolve conflicts faster. Clear communication about what each partner values as “care” prevents misunderstandings and ensures mutual respect.
Couples who prioritize mutual care report higher satisfaction. For instance, planning a special evening or sharing household tasks can reflect equal effort. The goal is to ensure both partners feel valued without one being relegated to a passive role.
- Tips for couples:
- Discuss expectations and boundaries openly.
- Offer gestures of care without expecting immediate returns.
- Ensure both partners feel valued and respected.
- Avoid dynamics where one partner sacrifices autonomy to please the other.
Social media reactions and criticism
The princess treatment trend has sparked polarized reactions online. While some couples embrace it lightheartedly, others view it as regressive. Comments on Courtney Palmer’s videos range from praise for romantic ideals to accusations of promoting control. One TikTok user, a former waitress, commented, “I’d be concerned if a customer acted like that—it feels like abuse.”
Conversely, creators like Charles Raynor from Ottawa argue that such gestures are “unwritten rules” of healthy relationships. Influencer Llaran Turner emphasizes that true princess treatment is about feeling cherished, not controlled. The divide reflects broader tensions between romantic ideals and modern gender equality.
- Supporters’ view: Gestures reflect love and mutual care.
- Critics’ concerns: Risks infantilizing women or creating power imbalances.
- Online discourse: Comments highlight a split between romance and regression.
Psychological and social implications
Psychologist Amanda White warns that princess treatment can harm women if it encourages suppressing needs to seem “perfect.” “Shrinking yourself to be loved fosters toxic dynamics,” she says. However, genuine, reciprocal gestures can strengthen emotional bonds and boost self-esteem. The trend also raises questions about gender equality, with some women embracing a “soft life” of fewer responsibilities, while others reject it to preserve autonomy.
This debate mirrors broader cultural tensions between feminist progress and romantic nostalgia, amplified by online movements like the “manosphere” and “tradwife” trends. The challenge lies in balancing affection with independence.
- Potential risks: Increased anxiety or emotional dependency in unbalanced dynamics.
- Possible benefits: Strengthened bonds through mutual care and respect.
- Social context: Tension between feminist ideals and romanticized traditions.
How couples can embrace mutual care
For couples adopting princess treatment without pitfalls, communication is key. Relationship coach Joshua Pompey advises, “Gestures should feel natural, not obligatory.” Mark Rosenfeld adds that care must flow both ways. Practical steps include planning surprises together, sharing responsibilities, or expressing gratitude for small acts.
A partner might cook a special dinner, while the other leaves a heartfelt note. These reciprocal gestures prevent care from becoming a burden or a power dynamic, ensuring both partners maintain autonomy and feel valued.
- Practical strategies:
- Plan joint surprises, like a special date night.
- Share tasks to avoid one-sided effort.
- Show gratitude for small acts of care.
- Set clear boundaries to preserve individual autonomy.
